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A Prison Filled With Smoke

 I drew with a pencil that broke in the middle I drew with the shorter half that choked on the riddle I knew it was going to be harder to hide my fiddle I drew on top of a scar that had been ripped open too far I drew the stitches to cover the leakage in rage I made the lead to break I drew dark glasses to hide my eyes from lies that cover my face I drew empty classes where I teach freedom I knew no one would come and take the risk that it encompasses I drew the bucket  that has holes everywhere I drew the station that never sees a train only the pain of everything passing right through the empty tracks I drew a relation that is always in tension what should I say how should I pay what should I do not to stay I drew a blanket to cover my soul I drew a bullet to destroy the ghoul I knew someone will call me out I knew someone will shout I drew a chair where I can sit and think about being fair I drew a floor filled with gravity of good time smoke gathered around me suddenly, I ...

Why Can't I

I am scared of dying alone..
I am scared of crying to my very bone.
I am scared of hands which detach..
I am.scared of any familiar touch.
I am scared of lying asleep with no one
Bothering to wake me up.
I am scared of going on with no one
Asking me to stay over.
I am scared of trying harder and then
Running into a dead end.
I am scared of closing eyes and waking
Up to a room full of strangers.
I am scared of tears flowing through cheeks which are unstoppable.
I am scared of words that means nothing.
I am scared of promises that always fall out.
I am scared of happiness which is short lived.
I am scared of innocence not so meaningful anymore.
I am scared of hidden stories beneath deep eyes.
I am scared of lies covered under pretty faces.
I am scared of politely killing someone.
I am scared of kindness withholding wrath.
I am scared of anger struggling to pounce on.
I am scared of smiles that I will never again encounter.
I am scared of lives just slipping away from my finger tips.
Sweaty hands dampening grip..
Why can’t I save anyone by the end of this trip.

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