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A Grieving Traveler

I sat in a train again Without you... I sat with pain again Without you.. I wish you were there I wish to get back your stare I wish to share some words How I wished to look out of the window the same way as yesterday.. This journey that I start again Without you... This journey that I pause more often Without you... As there is no one to put a hand on My shoulder of disdain.. As there is no one to just make a  Harmless gesture of being insane.. How I wished to sip that cup of tea with a relentless life beyond the sea waiting to be free.. *Dedicated to my mom as she shares her feeling of loneliness after my dad passed away last year. They both used to love traveling together... * picture courtesy the author while she captures this on her train ride to  Carlisle, PA.
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Troubled

I hate listening to songs,
Hate pondering wrongs.
I hate making faults,
Then absent mindedly admitting flaws.
I hate trusting fate,
I hate as it turns out lame.
I hate moments that I cry,
When someone bothers me with why.
I hate that tears just roll,
Like an evil troll.
When right then spring flowers bloom,
For a false heirloom.
Does it pain to be on the other side,
Or they just carefully pick the safe side.
I hate people who smile,
Underneath the heavier trial.
I hate making up,
Everytime it’s breaking up.
I hate wisdom,
Of island uncanny.
I hate truth,
Just blurted ruthlessly.
I hate sympathy,
Without even knowing what’s it like.
I hate long waits,
With endless traits.
I hate that gone,
Means trudging alone.
I hate being troubled,
Despite being the one gobbled by false hopes.
I hate that’s nothing new..
And I do hate the fact that I can never be you.
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