Friendly Addiction: Unlimited Interactions

  In life, we get all kinds of friends, some close, some closer, some strangers, some travelers. In my experience, at one point in my life, I had more than 500 friends, during my school days back in Carmel Convent School, Hamirpur, Rourkela. My parents would constantly see me getting phone calls, and visitors independent of their demographics.     

My father would smile and say, "Jenny, are you an IAS officer?, that you get so many calls in a day?" . I used to laugh in response and say, "Paa, they all want me to solve their problems, and I love the attention". 

  

How did this happen?, it didn't happen when I started school, trust me, I was really shy, hardly talking and surprisingly even my teachers in kindergarten had escalated issues, stating that I don't even show classwork to teachers during the class. I was the youngest, in my father's family and I had a total of 6 elder cousins to look upto, including my elder brother. When I started school, I was 3 and a half, really young, timid, shy, introvert, who had baby sitters, who loved and adored me, as I was the mildest kid anyone can babysit, one of them used to give me a cut piece of lemon in a bowl with salt, and I used to lick it all day long, while she used to do her work and happily stay alongside me. 

My mom started as a science school teacher at a local school in Rourkela called NAC High School, located in Sector 20. She decided to start my school earlier, as she found it hard to go to work and trust a babysitter all day long, and she wasn't finding any trustworthy ones. Finally, she convinced dad to send me to school, where at least I will start mingling with other kids and not be shy, slow, and boring. 

  First few years, were the worst, as it was a steep learning curve with all the new faces all around the school. But soon, I tried to accommodate some of social signals, from the kids, who were struggling the same way I was, I resonated with them more, than the ones who were all smiling and chirpy and playing and shouting the most during recess. Instead I tried to talk to those kids who, used to cry a lot, bring tiffin with cold food in it not able to eat, were unable to complete their homework due to power cut, were unable to understand what the teacher taught in class as they were too quick in switching subjects and only acknowledging the first bench kids, who said a yes to everything.

By the time I was in third grade, I had started to believe I need that one dear best friend, who will eat, talk, sit, and be forever alongside. I tried my luck, but every summer it used to happen, that the friend would find another friend as their best friend. Being in a all girls school, didn't help much. Soon I was tired of this inevitable search for best friend and was getting tired of it. One fine day, my teacher announced in class station who all are taking Catechism classes, I saw quite a few hands going up, and I loved the power of becoming a part of a group early on, rather than chasing individuals, likes, dislikes, mood swings, as soon as I put my hands up, my class teacher looked at me with astonishing expression. But she allowed me to accompany the group to the catholic lessons, I enjoyed the class thoroughly singing carols in chorus, praising Lord Jesus, getting to know the scriptures of the Bible, and for the first time I felt as a part of the community. After that class, I found friends not only in my own grade but seniors, juniors coming by the corridor and talking to me. 

Amazing is the power of community, soon by 5th grade, I had found the magical thread that tied the whole school together, innocence and compassion. I started to play with juniors who were younger to me, and they felt surprised to see me playing with them as a part of their group without any judgement. I enjoyed those recesses, where I used to teach them new games, and they used to let me choose it and guide them the right way. But my classmates, had started to talk about it, and confronted me multiple times as to why I had chosen that path instead of going the usual direction.

Well, friendships, are special, but at the same time, friends come along when you need them the most. They can be a person crossing the street saving you from a pothole, or a woman in the local train holding your hand saving you from the fall, they can also be a teacher who recognizes you among all the others and asks you to start stage performance as she wants to see you shine, or can be a philosopher in the library guiding kids to read the right books to guide their future. 

    My father, always had the hobby to invite anyone and everyone home and share books with them, starting from a shopkeeper, to a milkman, to a kid who came over to ask guidance, he didn't shy away to impart the knowledge despite of what role the person played in the society. I guess that's how I learned the art of giving any one and everyone the power to solve their problems, talk, educate, elevate independent of age, caste, color, creed. I remember, he used to tell me, that he did feel ignored when people used to never acknowledge that they got the knowledge from the books he had shared with them, endless number of neighbors, cousins, family members, friends, colleagues, kids of colleagues. But the ones who came in and said thank you, touched his heart the most.

"Friendship is those unlimited interactions, those discoveries you make alongside someone who has come to you for a reason. I hope all the kids out there don't just make friends to gain likes, dislikes, popularity, but make friends who have the power to support you mentally till the end of life."

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